Ok...i think this is the 3rd post in this week...
Really a weird yet overwhelming week for me...
As you can see from the 1st post till this 3rd one...there's different emotions and thoughts...
This one I'm writing is rather long...but I really do hope u guys can take some time to read...
Because your prayer is very much needed...
These few days...
I had this very strong feeling to actually pursue music full time...
As in letting go of my studies and just go...
But you know lar...irrational is not the key to success...
yeah, so 1st thing I did was submit everything to God...
really asking Him to:
1. to give me a clear thought...
2.Let my mind really function well...think straight...
3.If I still cant...then please send someone or through somebody ...to guide my thoughts....
God is always so faithful in our lives...
He knew clearly that my emotional mind cant function rationally...
So He did the no.3 way...
Today,in church we had a speaker from Langkawi...
I didnt expect His message would be that accurate to my condition...
He talked about Joseph...how he was betrayed by his brothers...sold to slavery...how he found his talent to interpret dreams...and finally became the 'perdana menteri' of Egypt...
You know...reading how God had changed and shaped Joseph life really made an impact on me...
Imagine he had to wait for 13 years to become an influential person and actually make a difference in a land where no one worship the true God...
and he made it...
God used that amount of time to shape Joseph so that he was prepared to face the future...
which required alot of character...
Imagine how hard it was to be a good Perdana Menteri...
It wont be easy for Pak-Lah though...
^^...okok...back to the topic
Looking back at myself...I'm rushing things too fast...
I know my calling...where I'm going to be in the future...
I'ts just that...I think I'm being overexcited and impatient already...
Pastor is right...we should wait and obey...
God's way is our way, but man's way is not always God's way...
So if we hurry things,we are eventually going to miss out blessings from God...
We are often not aware of the character needed to face the future...
You might think you are mature enough to face this industry...
but the fact is, the world is much complex than you ever know...
So what he said is like a slap on my face---->> dont hurry Jocelyn...
If I were to tell people of my calling,
some would laugh their heads off...(putus sampai ke lantai...HAHA)
many might not even believe in me...because it's very big...
some might say it's too ambitious or it's just fantasy...
It can only happen in my dreams...
But to those people...let me tell you...as long I work on it...and truly encounter God daily...
Keep close to Him...I shall prove you wrong...
So many people often think that the music and sports industry is not benefitial...($$ wise)
They will point to you where the money(ching ching) is...
and that's why many people gave up on the passion they once had
and pursue something they dont really want...
Missing out the blessings God had in their lives...
No matter what,I'm going to use this talent of mine to bless people...
and go where God's finger shows me...not human's finger ^^
At 1st I'm kinda shaken and doubtful because I worry that this dream is what I wanted not what He wanted...
But when pastor mentioned that when some people received something that others do not have...that's God's favour upon our lives...
It's truly an encouragement for me...and also another confirmation from God...
So...I'm going to take up the STPM and piano grade 8 challenge...
I know there's gonna be alot of tears and sweat...
It's gonna be worth the bet
It ain't a waste of time...even if I do not get 4A in the end...
Character building and upgrading my skills is the most important thing for now...
Guys...
Please pray for me...
That I wont lose this passion...
and always be the light wherever I am...
be a blessing to the people around me...
Most of all...may His plans be establish in my life.
AMEN!
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